I Let Go of Shame

I recently attended a transformational retreat with one intention: to love and accept myself even more than I do.

Toward the end of the retreat, a few women opened up about their shame. Not having children or being divorced more than once. As I listened, something inside me stirred.

I realized I’d been carrying my own quiet shame for years: the belief that something was wrong with me because I’d never married.

I’ve been engaged once, and I’ve shared my life with wonderful partners, but I always thought I should have been married by now. Somewhere along the way, I absorbed the message that being single at a certain age meant I’d somehow failed.

That belief wasn’t really mine. It was my family’s and society’s ideals.

But here’s what I didn’t expect:
I hadn’t recognized that what I was feeling all these years was actually shame.

I’ve done an incredible amount of emotional work on myself with EFT, meditation, inner child healing and I thought I had already cleared so much. Yet, I remained trapped in a deep sadness and longing. It wasn’t until that retreat, when I named it as shame, that it finally lifted.

Once I saw it clearly, it dissolved.

Here’s the thing I still want a relationship. I’d love to share my life with a partner who matches my energy, values, and heart. But what’s changed is this: I’ve released the lifetime of sadness and longing that came with that desire.

Now, I feel peaceful and open. No more grasping, no more believing my worth depends on being chosen.

Whether I meet someone or not, I know I’m whole, loved, and complete just as I am.

Shame can hide in plain sight—beneath our sadness, our longing, even our self-improvement work. It quietly tells us we’re not enough. But once we bring it into the light, it loses its power.

If you’ve ever carried shame, sadness, or longing about where you are in life, I invite you to gently question:

“Whose voice is that?”
“What if I’m already enough?”

When you release those inherited beliefs, you make space for the kind of love within and without that feels true and free.

If this resonates with you, my Emotional Clearing Method can help you uncover and release the hidden emotions that keep you stuck in shame or self-judgment—so you can trust yourself and open your heart fully, no matter what stage of life or love you’re in.

Because peace doesn’t come from changing your circumstances it comes from changing your relationship with yourself.